it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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