For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
