What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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