The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Are my feet made of real feet?
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
