my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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