sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
