I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
It's official drugs can't kill me
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
