Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Randomize