i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
