Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize