I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
