HIV tests are more positive than that guy
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
