the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize