If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
