I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
he just fucked me for my cheese..
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Randomize