I wish life had little blips of pornography
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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