In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
