People with herpes should wear stickers.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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