Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
