My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I can't trust your balls anymore.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
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