the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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