1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
