i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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