is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
