clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
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