ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
this just has baby written all over it
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
