cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Sorry my hands just texted you
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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