I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
