i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
