Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize
