She's JV to your varsity
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Randomize
