hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
