I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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