Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
