'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
