My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
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