if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
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