therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
