White coat. Heels.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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