I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
