if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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