I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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