I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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