I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
You work out of a Hotel?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
