Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
