She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize
