he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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