oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
