dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
