He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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